Sunday, April 19, 2009

I woke up this morning and hated myself

I had a dream last night that was very disturbing. I'm not going into detail, but I'll just say that the dream was sinful and it hurts knowing that I could have such a dream.

But then can we control our dreams? Why do we have dreams? Why did I have this particular dream?
In answer to those, no we cannot control our dreams, but we can learn from them and make the best effort to live or not live the way we did in the dream.
We have dreams because the brain is constantly working. Dreams are subconscience thinking and can be somewhat controlled by how we eat at the end of the day.
I believe I had this dream because God was trying to tell me that I had wandered away from Him and that it was time to get back.
We should never wander from God, but we so often do. God will search us out and He will find us. God found me last night and He told me to come home to Him.
I hated that dream and I hate myself for having it but I also am glad for it because now I'm coming back to my Father.
Now I must forgive myself and try to move on from it.
I only hope that the person that dream was told to can forgive me too.


  1. I am glad that even though the dream disturbed you, you've realized that getting closer to God is the most important thing. I know what it's like having disturbing dreams, but the wonderful thing is that we can always seek God for comfort, guidance, and protection from bad thoughts and even dreams. :)